New Gob? Ha, no just kidding, JOB!

So the grobes have found a job! A real human job! It's not warehouse life or (my current job)...customer service at Sears. I'm going to be talking to clients and being in charge of recruiting for positions they need filled. I'm super excited! Should be fun and challenging, and I'm looking forward to starting.

Currently in Somerville, with the two other lovelies, the Gay...and the wife. Yes, it's 7:30am on a Saturday, but I'm awake regardless. If I could fall back asleep believe me, I would. So let me tell you about my lovely trip trying to actually GET to Somerville.

Left work early and ran some errands, then headed towards NJ via the I-95. I think you may know it.

Supposed to look for rte 31N...yea, totally missed it. Or didn't go far enough. I never figured that out.

Got off at Exit 8A for Cranberry. Mandie call #1.

"What exit do you think 31N was?"

"Umm..4?"

"Ok, I went to far....shit."

"Yea, um ask someone where you are and how close you are to 287."

"I'll figure it out...ok bye."

"Bye."

I pull over and look at my handy dandy atlas...find im on 130N...it runs into Rte 1 which then runs into 287. I'm like sweet! I'm heading in the right direction!...Get back on the road.

Dad calls.

"Hey dad."

"Hey so you find where you are going, you ok?"

"Yea I'm ok now."

"Wanted to congratulate you on your new job. That's really exciting."

"Thanks, I shouldnt be on the phone, I'm in Jersey."

"Oh, right. Well have a good weekend."

"Thanks Dad, bye"

"Bye."

Ok so I'm heading N on 130. Keep going N. Ok see signs for 1! Sweet! Ok, I should be good now.

Uh....to Trenton (south) or Newark (North)? Um....I don't know! I dont even know where Somerville is in relation to either of those!...other option...take 171 through New Brunswick. Not a good idea. (Apparently not a great area.)

Call to Mandie #2.

"Ok, so I dont think I'm going the right way."

"Where are you, are you on Rte 1 yet?"

"I was going to be but then I wasn't sure. So I went straight."

"Ok well I don't think thats right, what are you on now?"

"171. In New Brunswick."

"How do you know that?"

"There is a sign saying, Welcome to New Brunswick."

"Oh. Well turn around get to a better part and ask someone for directions."

"I'll figure it out."

"No ask someone, a real person, the last time you said that you got lost."

"It's ok I'll figure it out."

"Ok fine, whatever. Bye"

"Bye."

Look at Atlas at light after turning around.

Ahhh! Should take Rte 1 towards Newark.

Call to Mandie #3.

"Ok rte 1 to Newark."

"Oh ok, so from there stay on it, and look for either 18N or 287N. 18N should be before 287."

"Ok."

(Mind you, Mandie is at the mall shopping during all this.)

Heading down 1....pass 18N for some reason don't take it. Ok. Fine well I dont wanna keep going looking for 287....so I turn around and get off for 18N. Follow that and then see signs for 287N....

Call to Mandie #4.

"Ok see signs for 287N."

"Ok good, stay on that and you'll drive past my work, and office buildings and when you come to the school turn left at the light on the street Centennial. It takes you to 287N."

"Ok."

"Then call me back. I think I'm going to get these shoes...They are kinda tight."

"Hum, what about a size up?"

"Well I dunno, I think I'm just going to get them."

"Ok. Sounds good....what do they look like?"

(This goes on for a little then I hang up.)

Drive Drive Drive....

Hum, don't see anything for Centennial. I go too far. Turn around.

Call to Mandie #5.

"You're not allowed to get off the phone with me anymore."

"Haha, Ok what happened."

"The signs for Centennial are not marked well, I think I passed it."

"Where are you?"

"I dunno!"

"Ok it's like 2 street lights after passing my work."

"Um, ok went too far."

"Ok turn around."

"Ok. oh see a sign now for 287N."

From here on since I am on the phone. And since It is pretty much a straight shot. I am golden.

Arriving at Mandie's I was well....tired and in much need for a stiff drink hah.

Made dinner, and then had a very nice evening with the Wife and Gay.

Now...waiting for the alarm to sound to get ready and showered for the day and head to NYC. Do some day drinking. Can't wait.

All for now....

Grobo.

Continuation of Uncomfortable Conversations

Gay you are onto something with this whole, "We are not entirely there" comment. I definitely feel this is true. I will tell you why.

I remember going to the gym with Monkey one afternoon, and I had lost my ID (which they swipe to let you in) but I printed out my gym confirmation e-mail showing I had purchased the said membership. Well, I knew what I was going to say when I was going up to the woman behind the counter to make sure that when I did come in I wouldn't face any problems....here is what I actually said.

Me: I um got this off my bursar, and i lost my ID card can I still get in, to um work out and stuff?"

Gym Lady: Yea, sure may I see the paper?

Me: Sure, sure....(holding the paper and showing her where I highlighted my purchase) It's um right there.

Gym Lady: Oh ok, yep thats no problem. You know you can only use this one time to get in right? I'll just circle this and make a star.

Me: Um, ok but I am not coming in right now, I just wanted to make sure, so when I come back in you'll remember me and that we just talked about this, and made sure it was ok? And what about the fitness classes can i get in with this too. (Keep in mind Monkey is looking at me telling me to hurry up, and im holding up a line of about 15 people.)

Gym Lady: Yep, you can still do the fitness class, and just show whoever is here the paper when you come in to use the gym.

Me: Ok and then I can get in. Ok thanks, bye.

(Literally about 15 seconds later after I put my stuff in a locker.)

Me: (to the Gym Lady) Ok im ready now, remember me? I can get in right?



Monkey to this day reminds me how awkward I was. Thanks Monkey. This was just a normal conversation for me though, haha.

The End,
Grobo

Patches of Dry Skin and other equally uncomfortable conversations

Ok ya know, I'm just gonna say it. Put it out there in the world. I LOVE awkwardness. I thrive off of the ability to make others stop and say "i'm sorry, but what the FUCK did you just say?!"

For example:

I was having an intimate moment with a casual lover the other weekend. This other person in question is like a cat in the sense that he lives to have his back scratched. So for some reason, I take it upon myself to throw this into the mix whilst scratching.

My awkward self: "Ya know, if you murdered me.."
(in)significant other: "What?! if i MURDERED you? What the hell are you talking about?"
Me realizing I've gone too far but i'm just gonna roll with it: "No, hear me out, I'm saying if you murdered me, CSI would catch you in a second because I probably have a lot of your skin cells underneath my fingernails"
Baffled male: "But why would I murder you?!"
Me, thinking this is a logical train of thought to have in an intimate moment: "I'm not saying you would, but ya know.. if you DID... you'd be caught. So I'd advise against it."

I never go into situations thinking OK, how can I make this creepy and awkward. Yet somehow I find myself speaking without a filter on many occassions and this is the kind of stuff that comes out. Another example:

I was sitting at the bar the other night and casually looking at a patch of skin on my chest. A stranger next to me (what I can only assume was a foolish guy considering hitting on me... exactly, a fool) asked me why I was rubbing my chest in a suggestive manner. I'm sure he was expecting some flirtatious answer. So instead I respond "Ah, man, I got this GNARLY patch of dry skin on my chest. It's like a piece of snake skin, LOOK!" At this point he took it upon himself to exit the conversation. Wise choice, bar patron. You don't want to get involved with this ball crazy.


So Gay and Grobo readers, consider yourselves warned. I think I can speak for Grobo when I say we're not all "there".

Warmest Regards,
Gay

Gay visits the Grobes

Gay visted me in the Charm City last weekend! Isn't that right Gay? We had a great time partyin and bullshit. I missed her, and wish the other wife could have been present but she was doin her own thing in New Jersey, the state where the most eggplant is grown. A correct answer by me from Tuesday Trivia!

Horray!

Warehouse Life

So today at the warehouse I started out my day in the hottest room in the building. I had to take apart a table and also a computer. From there I sat around for a bit until Jermeister found me some work. I made up boxes of Christmas cards for those last stragglers, who decide to order their Christmas card, let's see how many weeks after Christmas? Anyway-thanks for giving me something to do today. After that, it was lunch, and I filled orders- probably about 7 of them, which took a whole 20 minutes. After that, I spent the rest of the day putting plastic covers into memorial booklets.

Working at the warehouse isn't all that bad. I have a great group around me such as, Robot Man, Trina, Jean, Kim, and two new guys (James, and Josh).

Robot Man is my favorite. It probably isn't very nice of me to call him this, when I know his real name...but then again, who wouldn't want to be a robot? Robot Man, I assume used to do some smoking in his time.....he has, as one kindly put it, "a cancer hole" so he uses one of those voice-box vibrator contraptions. Even though I am fluent in robot, I can not seem to understand this language he speaks, it consists of...buzz buzz vibrate buzz vibrate...scrrews vibrate. I do the thing where you listen, ask,"I'm sorry what?" shake your head ask again, "Sorry?" and then just agree cause you feel bad asking a third time. Then he just stares at you cause he wanted an answer....slightly embarrassing but these things tend to happen to me a lot.

Well I'm tired, from working hard.....two more days until the weekend! Horray!

-Grobo-

John Stamos' Mullet Days: Still Hot

This post actually has nothing to do with John Stamos nor mullets. However, I am watching Full House and couldn't help but comment on the follicle-delight that is John Stamos in the early years of his career.

No, this post is about the power of the mix CD. Never underestimate it. I have thus far in my short life received mix CDs from at least 5 different sources I can think of (one of course being Grobo and another being her brother, however I didn't so much receive his mix CD as I did steal it from Grobo). However, I digress.

The mix CD can be a powerful aphrodisiac if you are as musically inclined as Gay and Grobo are. For example, I catch some U2, Creed, Coldplay, or any kind of death metal, we are obviously not going to happen as friends or lovers. But today I received in the mail mix CDs to trump all others thus far. Yes, you read that correctly. Multiple CDs. Just to name a few of the artists on these CDs:
Arctic Monkeys
Death Cab
Yeah Yeah Yeahs
MGMT
The Shins
Franz Ferdinand
LCD Soundsystem
Pearl Jam

Do I really need to go on? While mix CDs do not guarantee compatability, trust me, a good one definitely only helps your chances.

Currently Current Information

Let me clarify something about that story.

I was outside of the second floor balcony and I was talking with whether it be Brenda* or have it be the Hamburglar, either way one of the boys. I noticed that at the end of the hall there was a congregation of sorts forming in front of Monkey's door (old door or new door, I don't rememeber..most likely old door) and I started to do the Grobot, yes the name had not been established at this point but the hilarity still ensues.

That is the correct version, I do also remember Cardi, and maybe someone else pointing and laughing saying, "Look Look!" like they have never seen someone doing the robot from outside the door window before, pshh...

* names have been changed to protect their privacy-however brenda is a boy (don't get confused)

Gay's First Post: My Grobo Mental Image

I figured it would be fitting to describe how I picture Grobo in my head as my first random mind-musings blog post. The funny thing is that I was not even there to witness this image I have of her, I just heard it from Mandie. It was one afternoon that the two of them were at the Cat House doing what one usually does at the Cat House. Grobo had wandered off, like she does, so Mandie was looking around for her. She sees someone who points her in the right direction and comments "Yea, she's right there, she's fine". By fine, she meant Grobo doing the Grobot dance at the end of the hallway.

This is for some reason forever burned into my memory and will always be the first thing I think of when I think of Grobo.

:)

Hellllloooo!

So Gay and I (Grobo) are starting to document the much needed happenings of our minds. It is an amazing thing, and at times a scary thing. So be prepared to have your minds blown, and if there are questions....don't ask, just go with it.

-Grobo-